A Toothless Smile

“Wow,” my friend said to my son, “Did you lose a tooth?”  

“I lost FIVE all at the same time!” exclaimed Noah with pride.

It was nothing exciting like a baseball smashing his teeth out as he slid into home plate or a bobcat attack.  The circumstances were as boring as they get.  Noah’s five front baby teeth weren’t coming out, and they needed to be out pronto to make room for the new ones.  

As we made our appointment with the dentist, I reminded her that Noah’s body cannot handle the laughing gas, so he would have to get them removed fully awake and aware.  

“Well,” she said, “This does not normally go well without the laughing gas to relax them.  We will get as many out as we can, but you may have to do this in several appointments.”

As I sat in the waiting room, I let my freak flag fly high.  Since I had given up being considered normal long ago, this wasn’t even a challenge for me.  In front of the whole waiting room, I pulled off Noah’s socks and lathered his feet up with Peace & Calming, Stress Away, and Lavender to help him totally relax.  I also put Valor on his wrists and temples for confidence.

“Noah!”  the assistant called. 

I must have had a worried look on my face as Noah got up because he looked back at me said, “I got this Mom.”

20 minutes later, Noah was in my car with a mouth full of cotton and a jar full of teeth.  The doctor couldn’t believe that Noah was so relaxed and brave that she was able to get all five of the teeth out!

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A Breath of Fresh Air

No gum.  No mints.  No sweets.  Two pounds over my “highest weight I would ever allow” became five.  Okay fine, ten.  It’s that time of year again, and at some point, I was going to have to wash my jeans.  Or even worse, buy new ones.  So, I did it. I ordered the stuff and began a new diet program that I just know will change my life forever. I am quite sure I will never crave carbs or sweets again, and I will also be skinny for the rest of my life.

The only problem (well, besides the fact that my stomach is growling as I write this) is that I met with several people today.  Without my gum and mints and constant snacking, I am not even close to being confident that my breath doesn’t totally stink like a dead animal! 

I have been on the other side of this, talking to that skunk-breathed person, frantically plotting my escape as I take one small step back at a time, giving personal space a larger boundary.  I don’t want to be that person you only talk to behind counters so they are physically trapped and cannot come any closer.

Luckily, I have a very wise friend.  She said, “You have peppermint oil right in front of you!”  Duh!  Sometimes the obvious just completely eludes me.

I dropped one drop of peppermint on my tongue and once again spoke with confidence.  The peppermint, literally, is a breath of fresh air.

PS:  That picture above is what I plan to look like after my diet.  I might even dye my hair brown.

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Sugar Rush

It was the first day of my diet, and my sugar cravings were raging!  Somehow knowing I couldn’t have it made me want it even more.  Although I had purged the kitchen the night before in preparation, I made a mental checklist of all possible sugary items that I could still put in my mouth without even a minute of preparation.  1/4 of a bag of chocolate chips in the cabinet, kids’ gummies in the pantry, and a spoonful of brown sugar…no, I am not above it.  I could almost taste the sweet delight on my tongue and the rush of endorphins to my brain that would immediately lighten my mood.  I needed a fix, and I needed it quick.

Just as I opened my pantry to go straight for the gummies, I saw my Slique Tea.  Was it even possible that this sweet, chocolaty, healthy tea could tide me over until I was at a more mentally stable day in my diet?  I warmed the water and dipped two tea bags in ...because more is always better, right?  As I reached the bottom of the cup, I decided that I would have a salad for lunch.    

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Would You Eat 26 Year Old Gum?

 I did.

It was the day before Thanksgiving, and we had our super fun family from Chicago in town.  Free-spirited good times always reign when they show up on our doorstep.  Common sense is often abandoned in the quest to keep the carefree, holiday atmosphere going strong.  So when Greg’s brother, Mark, announced that he bought gum from 1988 at the card store, there was no need to think it through.  I immediately announced, “I am in!”

As I started to chew the gum, it instantaneously dissolved in my mouth.  There was no spitting it out and no getting rid of the nasty toxins that quickly traveled down my throat deep into the pit of my stomach.  It only took about 10 seconds for me to realize that gum, unlike fine wine, does NOT get better with age.  My stomach began to gurgle, and I felt sick.

Luckily, my essential oil drawer was in the kitchen nearby.  I filled my glass with water, put a drop of peppermint in for my indigestion, and added a few drops of lemon to help detox.  A few minutes passed, and I was ready to take on some more stupid fun.  I couldn’t wait to see what we would do next!  

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Surviving the Cold and Flu Season with Essential Oils

I am so thankful that I was able to teach a class at Dr. Bain's office today, and tomorrow I will get to share similar information at Progressive Pediatric Therapy!  We talked about how to survive the cold and flu season with Essential Oils.  Here are the notes for those who missed.  Click on the image to enlarge.

 

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My Oil Obsession Blog Inspiration

The night was finally here.  My heart was pounding every time I even thought about it.  It was finally going to happen.  I had waited almost 30 years for this!  My worlds had collided….what luck!  My autism hero, Jenny McCarthy, had married my teenage heartthrob Donnie Wahlberg from NKOTB, and tonight I was going to meet him!  I wasn’t sure when he would arrive at the party, but my eyes darted in a perfectly planned circular pattern around the room over and over until I was feeling dizzy.

 

Then mid-spin, I saw him across the room.  No, not Donnie, but there stood J. Peterman from Seinfeld.  I knew he had a real name, but that was not important.  I plowed through the crowd toward him and asked the pretty lady he was standing next to if she would take our picture.  “Sure,” she said as she gracefully and kindly took more than a few shots.  It was important that she got my best side. :)

Wonder why J. Peterman looks less than mildly amused?  It wasn’t because he finally figured out that Elaine was Suzie and Suzie was Elaine in one of my favorite episodes.  No.  It was because it was his real life wife that I asked to take our picture.

 

After that meeting, I knew that my oil blog needed to be as silly as a J. Peterman Catalog.

And yes, I did meet Donnie Wahlberg that night.  I did talk to him just long enough to ask him to take one awful, flashless, star struck, amateur selfie with me!

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